FALLING AWAY

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Growing up, I didn't have much to stress about, even though I didn't have a lot and some days went by with nothing to eat. I'm from a small family of five, with two older brothers. My mother was a Jehovah's Witness and taught me to fear God, Jehovah, and that He is always watching over me and listens to us when we pray to Him. "The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom" (Proverbs 9:10). Like many believers, I was fully devoted with unshakable faith. Even in primary school, I'd stand up for what I believed in and go door-to-door spreading the gospel. "Go and make disciples of all nations" (Matthew 28:19). In every situation, I'd pray about it. "Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you" (1 Peter 5:7).


My father, who worked in the mines, would visit us once or twice a month, and I'd pray that God would help us live together as a happy family. "I pray that you may be active in sharing your faith" (Philemon 1:6). But life took a dramatic turn when I was 14. My father passed away, and it felt like my heart was ripped apart. "My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?" (Psalm 22:1). I started questioning God's plan: "Why would God allow this to happen?" "Why would He hurt me like this?" I struggled to find answers and turned to smoking weed to numb the pain, which led to drinking alcohol. "Do not be conformed to the pattern of this world" (Romans 12:2).


As time went on, I drifted away from my faith and started to forget my relationship with God. This led to poor academic performance, and I failed my 10th grade. "The path of the righteous is like the morning sun" (Proverbs 4:18). My mother encouraged me to stay in school, and I eventually passed my matric. I moved to Braamfischer to continue my studies, but instead of paying my registration fees, I used the money to buy weed. "Do not be deceived: God is not mocked" (Galatians 6:7-8).


I got involved in some dark situations, and my life took a downward spiral. "The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy" (John 10:10). I started selling weed at school and got caught up in a world of deception. Eventually, someone offered me a deal to sell crystal meth, which I accepted despite my cousin's warnings. "Watch out for false prophets" (Matthew 7:15). I was trapped in a cycle of addiction and greed, but God's love and mercy pursued me.


But by God's grace, I managed to get out of drugs without going to any rehabilitation center. "I can do all this through Him who gives me strength" (Philippians 4:13). Five months after being clean, I landed a job as a security officer at Fidelity Security Group. "A faithful man will abound with blessings" (Proverbs 28:20). I worked for 2.5 years, then resigned and gave my life to God. I got baptized in Cape Town and soon started being involved in prison ministry with Hope Prison Ministry. "Go and make disciples of all nations" (Matthew 28:19).


As I reflect on my journey, I realize that God's love and redemption are greater than any mistake or failure. "For I know the plans I have for you” (Jeremiah 29:11). I'm grateful for the lessons learned and the opportunity to serve others. "The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit" (Psalm 34:18).

(2021)
"I felt lost and depressed" 

"I believe that whatever God has for me in life, is way more than I can think of." 




Comments

  1. Anonymous7/17/2025

    It good to me to be able to get the message and the concept of the word. Thank you so much my brother, I am Sihle Mtshali wakwa Ndlovu known as Brother Sihle ugatsheni womgunyathi.

    ReplyDelete

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